Self-Care Makes You Better, Period

Self-care is not a selfish act, it’s an act of self-love and self-preservation.

I often wonder when did working and/or becoming a mother become synonymous of “I’m not worthy”? Listen, “my hips don’t lie” anymore and I make it a point to schedule and get in a manicure and the bottom line is:  It’s not ok to forget about you. 


View this post on Instagram


A post shared by Vanessa Coppes (@vanessacoppes)

Here are 3 reasons why you shouldn’t:

1) Self Care Improves Your Emotional Health: Taking time out to care for yourself can remind you and others that you and your needs are important, too. It conveys to others that you value yourself. This can contribute to long-term feelings of wellbeing.

2) Self Care Makes You a Better Caretaker: When you neglect your own needs and forget to nurture yourself, you are at danger of deeper levels of unhappiness, low self-esteem and feelings of resentment. Also, when you spend your time only taking care of others you are at risk for getting burned out on all the giving, which makes it more difficult to care for others or yourself. Taking time to care for yourself regularly can make you a better caretaker for others, specially your children.

3) Self Care Releases Stress: Giving your body some special treatment is a natural way to relieve stress. Spa-related activities like massage and warm baths have been known to sooth even small colicky babies like nothing else. These activities continue to be effective tools for relaxation as we get older.

Now go, what actions will you take TODAY to take care of yourself?

Do you have a question? PLEASE, let’s connect HERE or leave me a comment below!

In Between

We All Have a First

Yesterday, at a workshop for The Entrepreneurial Think Tank for Moms, we were graced with Melissa McDowell’s blogging expertise. As a blogging enthusiast myself, the information was exciting because I love sharing my love for blogging, specially to my ETTMoms!

Blogging, vlogging, getting yourself and your business ‘out there’…the common thread at last night’s workshop was fear.

Seeking reassurance from other people is a dead end.

Reassurance needs to be found from within you, not from others.

We all have to start somewhere.

We all have a first! You cannot run without walking first. You start by turning on your belly, then you build up your muscles to army crawl, then you crawl…eventually you walk and then run.

To get here, I had to start somewhere… and so much has changed since 2009. Here’s a look back at all my firsts:

1. My first piece of jewelry (featured in the post above)

2. My First ‘professional’ headshot (my husband took that pic)


3. My first blog post

Mommypreneuring is serious business…

As if being a stay-@-home-mom wasn’t overwhelming enough…here I go, starting my own business.

The last year has been an amazing one. Hard, but truly amazing. In between diaper changes, teething and wire-wrapping I’ve managed to be mom, wife and jewelry maker…and still kinda keep it “together”.

I cannot complain or take for granted one second of the ride. I’ve been blessed with a healthy baby boy, a supportive husband, and a jewelry business that has allowed me to express the creative being within me.

Many sleepless nights, cuts on both hands, burns from glue guns and yes…bottles and sniffles…helped create enV by Vanessa Coppes.

This path has allowed me to discover that women really are superwomen. That yes, we can do it all…and still manage to put on lipstick (some days).

The most important recognition has been that dreams do come true. If you really work at it, and are honest (with yourself and others) every step of the way, your efforts will be rewarded.

I know I knew this and more before…but when you are inspired and your spirit is uplifted in the sweetest way… you feel capable of holding the world in your hands.

4. My first VLOG (video blog) You can also watch here:

So my friends, take the leap of faith, put your message out there, let yourself be seen. How else are you going to help all the people who are out there waiting for your awesomesauce ?

BTW: I finished the FIRST draft of my FIRST book!!! Scared? Totally! Excited? Even more so! My goal is to have it ready for sale at my FIRST business conference. I hope you will join me on this journey:


Ego: Be Aware + Decide to Let Go

One of the hardest things to let go of for some people is their ego. I am not exempt from it. I work on it everyday.

I am sure you can identity when ego is acting up in others: those who always think they are right, who control and those who think and act like they are above other people. There’s been a lot of dialogue lately amongst some of my close colleagues and friends about ‘ego’ and how it affects how we interact with each other.

Yeah, I go there with my friends. If you know me well…you know I am more open to talking about things like these than I am about shoes. (Geez…I know).

Reading some Deepak this morning, I came across an excerpt where he describes the three things the ego is doing all the time:

1) the need to control,

2) the need to be approved, and

3) the need to judge.

He adds, “Be aware of them every time they come up and decide to let them go.”

I know that it may be difficult to do but I have found that  meditation and prayer have  helped me identify when those feelings arise.

When I decided to live what I call a fabulous  life, a life filled with abundance, child like wonder and awareness all while being my perfectly imperfect self I learned that I am constantly evolving, growing, learning from myself and others.

When you decide to go beyond your ego and the internal dialogue…you can reach a state of bliss, joy and yes, live fabulously.

How do you practice awareness? Has your ego held you back? I’d love to hear what you do. Leave me a comment below.


3 Steps to Finding Abundance in Your Life

Do you look at the glass as half way filled or half way empty? If you’re see it empty, you can change the cycle. Here are 3 steps you can take to find abundance in your life:
Step 1: See the world as an abundant, providing, friendly place. When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. When you see the world as abundant and friendly, your intentionsare genuine possibilities. They will become a certainty, because your world will be experienced from a world that provides rather than restricts. You’ll see a world that wants you to be successful and abundant, rather than one that conspires against you.
Step 2: Affirm: I attract success and abundance into my life because that is who I am. This puts you in harmony with your Source. Your goal is to eliminate any distance between what you desire and that from which you pull it into your life. Abundance and success aren’t out there waiting to show up for you. You are already it, and the Source can only provide you with what it is, and, consequently, what you already are.

Step 3: Stay in an attitude of allowing. Resistance is disharmony between your desire for abundance and your beliefs about your ability. Allowing means a perfect alignment. An attitude of allowing means that you ignore efforts by others to dissuade you. It also means that you don’t rely on your pervious ego-oriented beliefs about abundance being a part of or not a part of your life. In an attitude of allowing, all resistance in the form of thoughts of negativity or doubt are replaced with simply knowing that you and your Source are one. Picture the abundance you desire freely flowing directly to you. 
In Between

I AM HERE and I Am Living Out Loud

As you may or may not know, I am on a journey to finish writing my book. My book’s title is “5 Steps to Fabulous: Choices for Living Beautifully, Inside & Out”.

Since I started talking about it a few years ago, many of my colleagues and friends have encouraged me to embrace the process…you know, the one of telling your story. Everyone has one to tell.

The more I work on my book, the more excited I get, because in sharing my story I continue to heal.

Here’s the thing…when you’ve been abused, have suffered from depression and have lived in dark spaces that  you later realize exist only in your head…you are only able to get to a better place when you speak about those things out loud. When other people who share similar feelings and who show you, that you’re not the person you thought yourself up to be (you don’t have to believe everything you think)  knowing that you’re not alone is quite liberating.

When I told a friend about my book her question to me was, “What makes you think you have the know how to tell others how to live a ‘fabulous’ life?”

Great question and a few years ago, I would have let that question break me down. But  I pointed out to her that her question is precisely why and my know how.

You see, thinking I was broken, I spent too many years living to please others, too many years thinking of other people’s feelings and needs before my own, too many years questioning my existence.

Several years ago, I faced the demons in my head…the monkeys, the crazies…whatever you choose to call them…and through prayer and A LOT of self love my book details the choices I made to live what I now consider to be a fabulous life.

As I do here on my blog, I share with you  what worked for me, but above all…how it’s YOUR life and YOUR choice to decide how you live it.

So, my know how is my journey, my journey is my why.

I also know that in sharing your story…you set others free.

Onward Chicas! To living fabulously!

In Between

The Synergy of Giving + Receiving

The world we see reflects our internal frame of reference. If we live scarcity, unfairness, drama…that is what we project.

Think of how much more good we’d do in the world if instead of projecting and reacting, we extended and connected?

We’d have better relationships, less stress, ultimately more love and happiness. We’d actually be able to see and feel this in/from others, we’d be able to give it and be better able to receive it.

You see, life is a 2 way street…it is both a blessing: to give and to receive.

“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Dr. Wayne W. Dyer