You do everything for everyone all the time. You give and give and give and never ask for anything in return. You try so hard to make everyone else happy. Does this sound like you? Are you always going out of your way to keep the peace?
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We all want to be considerate and thoughtful, but when we only speak or act in ways we think other people want us to because we need them to think we are nice, is a complete disservice to yourself AND them.
Here are 3 reason why:
1. Being too nice keeps you from having close relationships.
When we don’t speak up or show up as who we really are it actually keeps us disconnected and feeling lonely.
No one will be able to connect with you in an honest, deep, and meaningful way if you are not yourself.
People thrive on connecting with REAL people. We want and need real. And yes, real sometimes can get messy, but it’s human.
2. Being too nice leads to a victim mentality.
It takes courage to stand up and say, “This is who I am, this is what I need, and this is how and what I can and want to give.”
That’s a better and healthier approach than keeping inventory about how many times you’ve been nice to others and/or feeling ripped off if other people don’t treat you the same way.
You are responsible for yourself. If you want or need something, it’s your responsibility to voice that. We can’t expect others to read our minds to see how much we think they owe us because of how nice we’ve been to them n the past.
3. Being too nice makes you a stranger to yourself.
When we navigate life trying to make everyone else happy and never consider our desires, we are rejecting and neglecting who we really are.
It’s not always about you, but it’s also not ever not about you.
If you never allow yourself to play an active and equal role in your relationships and in your life, you will never give yourself the opportunity to appreciate your true self.
Lesson: Practice being more genuine and authentic with others and yourself. Practice sharing your thoughts, opinions, and ideas…and here’s the big kicker…do it even if some people may not agree with you.